I did a thing

Reviving a long dead blog to say this: I did a thing... I got a PhD! Five days ago I successfully defended my dissertation. It doesn't quite feel real yet.

addictive stashing

Hello, my name is Emily and I am a yarnaholic. Please do not get me wrong, I am not poking fun at AA or NA members. I am just trying to come to terms with the fact that I have a problem - I feel like I am buying yarn somewhat compulsively. Why? It is soothing I guess; the past two years have been enormously stressful and I seem to have responded to that stress by buying yarn. It is true that it isn't booze or drugs or boxes of twinkees/pints of Ben & Jerrys, but I can't help wonder why I am stress-buying yarn. Just for the sake of being honest, I have (according to ravelry's handy stash tool) a little over 112 miles of yarn to knit. Writing that made my chest tighten up a little. (btw - I live in an apartment in NYC, so not a huge amount of storage space) I think i need to find a new outlet for my stress...

Finally settling in, maybe

I am a graduate student (PhD student heading into my 2nd year) preparing for a life in academia. Yes, I know the odds and I know the dismal hiring picture at universities these days. I know that I spent nights last year crying, convinced I was in the wrong department, wrong university, in the wrong field, in the wrong life altogether. That view was reinforced when there was a little snafu and my scholarship acceptance had never been processed - they told me everything was fine, but one day I get a bill from the university for nearly $20,000 (for a single term) and when I called the appropriate office I was told that "they had never heard back from me and the money had gone to someone else." Good thing I responded via email and cc'ed several people in my department. Thankfully, that has been resolved. Anyway, I have been adjunct teaching a course this summer and although I have been been in front of students loads to times (years of test prep at the Princeton Review have come in handy), this is the first time I have had my own class. I'm teaching graduate students. The experience has been challenging and some days it has been demoralizing. I always somehow feel like I am failing my students somehow, that no matter how much prep work I do, no matter how many examples I put in the lecture, I can't shake the feeling that it is somehow not enough. Anyway, today I got my peer observation report and it was overwhelmingly positive. I'm thrilled and it does go a distance to alleviating that failing feeling, but not entirely - I guess that comes with time and teaching experience. Perhaps I'll get used to the idea that some students will fail no matter how much help they are offered. Another nice thing happened today - I may join a training grant. the PI on the grant is a professor whose course I took this past term and really enjoyed. I was the only doctoral student and I may have been the only one there taking the course just out of interest. It would mean giving up my scholarship money, but since that is so anxiety-provoking, that may not be a bad thing. The training grant would cover my tuition and kick in a stipend. I think I'll be able to keep my job as well - which is good, they are in complementary areas in my field. I just submitted the application and personal statement. I feel anxious and yet relieved at the same time - no matter what happens, it is out of my hands. Now I just need to survive the next two weeks of teaching and grading. Oy, the grading. Wish me luck.

Finally on vacation

Finally took a week off.  Now what?  I have lectures to prepare, a grant propsal draft to work on, a closet that desperately needs cleaning out, a mountain of laundry that calls out to me (something about clean socks?) and a million other small things I need to get done in the next six days.  Am I going to do any of those things today?  Perhaps.  Later.  This morning I am going to see The Avengers!  I will see anything Joss Whedon does and I usually love it.  What's funny is that I realized that this will be my first time in a movie theater in about 6 years.  You didn't misread that.  6 years.  I hate the texting, talking, nextel-ing, tweeting, and the parents who bring children to inappropriate films and then fail to take the terrified/bored/cranky children outside for fear of missing a minute of movie.  So at 10am on a Tuesday, I am heading to the movies.  Wish me luck.

I'm not dead yet, in fact, I'm feeling much better

Hello, my name is Emily, and I am a bad blogger. It has been more than 3 years since I posted here. I am embarassed to admit that I needed a password reset because I couldn't even remember my login or password for this blog. In my defense, it has been an adventurous few years. I got a masters degree (MPH), got a professional job (no more jeans at work, I'm still sad about that) and was accepted into (and joined) the doctoral program (PhD) at Columbia University. I just completed my first year. So I guess I'll have to change the title of the blog, as I am no longer a would-be graduate student!

RIP John Updike

A few hours ago, I read about the passing of the author John Updike. If you haven't read him, you should. I recommend:

The Witches of Eastwick
The Widows of Eastwick (a 20 year later follow-up to The Witches of Eastwick)
The Rabbit novels

RIP

Free at last, free at last

Ok, so I am stealing a great Civil Rights phrase and using it for something silly: a [Finally] finished object:

The Crazy-making blanket (once known as the Learn To Knit Afghan) is complete. I even wove in the ends.





I think the blanket-making bug is out of my system. Unfortunately I am halfway through another blanket. (Good thing it is a cold winter!) I am halfway through with a blanket that is a combination of the Knitters squares from The Great American Afghan, The Great American Aran Afghan, The Great North American Afghan, and Vogue Stitchionary: Cables. I'm too far along to rip it out, but I don't really want to finish it either. Way to start a new year.

Happy New Year!

2008 had some high points and some (really) low points, but I'm conflicted about kicking it to the curb. I realize that I don't have any choice - 2009 didn't ask my opinion about arriving and arrived it has.

We are still early enough in the year to hope that the lowest points 2009 brings us will be on par or better than the highest points of last year. May 2009 and bring us all health and happiness.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Happy birthday to me!
Happy birthday to me!
Happy birthday to me!
Happy birthday to me!

Rejoice! Not only because it is my birthday (although that should be reason enough) but because a Cardiff based psychologist as declared that June 20th is the happiest day of the year. (No, really - he has an equation and everything. It is very scientific.)

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2158104/Today-is-the-happiest-day-of-the-year-according-to-Cliff-Arnall's-maths-formula.html

still here

and still in a life funk. But, at least it has been sunny, mostly. This morning on NPR they did a story on Buffy the Vampire Slayer and I was so tickled by the idea of these two entities: NPR and BTVS overlapping I just wanted to post the story link. It actually was pretty interesting.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=90584068

funk

While I may be too late to help make Stephen Colbert google's Greatest Living American, I wanted to share a little laugh (who couldn't use a laugh?) courtesy of S'n'B last night:

Eddie Izzard as Darth Vader in LEGO!



About the funk of the title, I am in a knitting funk. I just can't seem to find something that appeals to me and that I can actually use for myself. I don't know, perhaps it is just the general life funk that has finally crept into my knitting which is well, really bad. I just looked over my 2007 charity knitting stats and I realized that I am not being as generous this year. Oh well. That is the sum total of emotion that I can generate over that.

I need (at the least) for the knitting funk to go away. Soon.

Silent Poetry Reading

Here is my poem for the blogger silent poetry reading on Groundhog Day.

The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge

full text is here http://rpo.library.utoronto.ca/poem/530.html

My favorite part:

610 Farewell, farewell! but this I tell
611 To thee, thou Wedding-Guest!
612 He prayeth well, who loveth well
613 Both man and bird and beast.

614 He prayeth best, who loveth best
615 All things both great and small;
616 For the dear God who loveth us,
617 He made and loveth all.

Happy Groundhog Day or Feast of St. Brigid if you celebrate

NaNo 2007

It's official - I'm done.

The story isn't finished and I probably have a million typos and inconsistencies (John became James etc) but for the moment, I'm done.

Official wordcount: 50,326 words.

Surprisingly enough, the words the end were not among them

NaNoWriMo

The end is in sight.

So little time (13.5 hours) and so many words to go...

Presents! (both the giving & receiving)

My Ravelry Scarf Exchange swap is complete.

First, the giving:


I would love to take the high adult road and claim that giving is better tahn receiving, but I just can't. The receiving:



Eat your heart out ladies, that is a malabrigo scarf I have there.

quick update

I am knitting the 16th square of a mini-Learn to Knit Afghan for the December Afghans for Afghans newborn drive. I'm trying desperately to use up the Lamb's Pride in my stash. I love the colors of this yarn and I really like feel of the fabric it knits up into, but I can't can't can't stand the mohair. Especially the shedding mohair. Everywhere.

I just keep telling myself that there is no place like a mohair-free home.

two posts in one day?

Just finished today's writing and my new word count is: 11,704. Casualty count?

• 1 ruined Halloween courtesy of the aftereffects of a hurricane
• 10 frightened children
• 1 frightened, threatened protagonist
• 1 murder victim
• 1 Elvis impersonator assaulted (by said protagonist)
• 1 child in pirate costume made fun of (by other children) for his too dignified monocle
• several pounds of halloween candy drowned in rain water (I'm not sure how many unhappy children that converts into, however)

On the knitting front, I have completed my Ravelry Scarf Exchagne Scarf. I just have to block it. (No pictures until I mail off the scarf and assorted goodies)

NaPoBogMo vs NaNoWriMo vs NaKniSweMo

Boy am I glad I didn't sign up for two out of the three - I can barely keep up with the one I did sign up for. Besides, who do I think I'd be kidding if I said I was going to blog everyday for a month? Knit a sweater in a month? Hah! (Knit a blanket square everyday for a month, maybe...hey, there's an idea NaBlanKnitMo, anyone? Who's with me?)

Anyway, I am participating in NaNoWriMo or the National Novel Writing Month. This is my third time, and if I hit the 50k mark, it will be my second "win." In an effort to keep myself honest, I am embedding a progress meter here. Let's see if it works

somebody stop me!

I have yet to block & assemble my learn to knit afghan, in fact, I have yet to stop making squares.

Initially I aded one square (the hounds-tooth check from A Treasury of Knitting Patterns by Barbara Walker) to the 63 in the book so that I could have an 8x8 afghan instead of a 7x9. Never one to leave well enough alone I have knit another 8 squares bringing the total up to 72 squares for an 8x9 afghan. If I don't move on to the next step soon, it will become a 9x9 and then a 9x10 or even a 10x10 afghan. I only have a queen sized bed!

I just can't seem to get out of the blanket/afghan/throw rut, however. Why I can't commit to a sweater right now is anyone's guess. Argh.

Pictures of the last 20 or so squares to come, hopefully later today.

Farmhouse Yarns

aka Stash Enhancement

Jenn, Sami, and I ventured out into the wilds of Connecticut and went to Farmhouse Yarns for her "fill-a-bag" sale. It was something alright. I originally planned to buy nothing (yes, feel free to laugh here - can you imagine me leaving a yarn sale empty-handed? Apparently neither could I) having just come along for the ride. Yup.

But, I didn't do too badly - the three of us split a bag ($159 for all the yarn you can shove in a bag and shove is the operative word here) and I came home with 6 skeins of yarn. By my standards that's practically nothing, anyway.

The loot:

• 2 skeins Bessie (mohair/wool)in Rainforest
• 2 skeins Bessie (mohair/wool)in Wine Rose
• 2 skeins Andy (100% merino wool)in Violet

Visually:

*Yes, there is a skein missing - one of the violet skeins is already on its way to becoming a pair of fuzzy feet slippers for me. It's getting cold here and felted slippers seem like a perfect use for this yarn*